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Therapist discovers her destiny


In December 2012, Ashley D'Amico, a li-censed massage therapist, was chosen as a foreign ambassador by the US-based Liddle Kidz Foundation to travel across Viet Nam to teach caregivers the uplifting touch of massage necessary to mend the spirits of children.

by Nguyen Khanh Chi

Inseparable: Ashley D'Amico holds Nguyen Thi Hai Yen in her arms at the birthday party. D'Amico is determined to adopt the little girl, even it takes her many years. — VNS Photo Khanh Chi

In December 2012, Ashley D'Amico, a li-censed massage therapist, was chosen as a foreign ambassador by the US-based Liddle Kidz Foundation to travel across Viet Nam to teach caregivers the uplifting touch of massage necessary to mend the spirits of children.

The three-week trip was almost completed when she visited the kids at the Centre for Treatment, Education, and Social Labour No 2 in Ba Vi District, Ha Noi. The centre has a special section that cares for Nguyen Thi Hai Yen and the other 78 children who are infected by HIV/AIDS.

On the way to the orphanage, D'Amico experienced a lot of anxiety for the first time during her trip.

An instant connection

Later, the feeling D'Amico attributed to anxiety would turn out to be something she called a "destiny" between her and four-year-old Yen. After Yen's mother died of AIDS two years ago, and her mentally-ill father was unable to take care of her and her six-year-old brother, they came to live in the centre.

"While the other orphans just stared at me and wondered why I wanted to play with them, little Yen didn't," D'Amico recalled.

"Yen just walked up to me when we were on stage doing demonstrations. It was then that I showed her how to do massage therapy.

"I wanted to see how well we got along with each other after that, so I spent the rest of the day with her. We ate lunch together and after we spent some time together, Yen fell asleep in my arms."

Spontaneous bond

After D'Amico returned to Philadelphia, the 25-year-old never stopped thinking about the spontaneous bond that seemed to have formed with Yen, and began thinking about adopting her.

D'Amico wanted to adopt children from when she was 13, since adoption was sort of a family tradition.

"My mother was adopted and so was my brother. I have 15 adopted cousins," D'Amico said.

"Adoption isn't a big thing, no one in my family has any sort of negative feelings towards it. To me, there are so many kids out there that need a home."

Though Yen has AIDS, adopting her is not something that troubles D'Amico.

"AIDS doesn't mean you have a shorter life span. If you get the proper medication and treatment, you can live a long and happy life.

D'Amico clearly understands that Yen, and those who suffer from disabilities, didn't choose their hardships. Nor did D'Amico, who was involved in a horrific car accident nine years ago that changed her world completely. From then on, her life revolved around improving herself and by gaining strength and confidence. During her rehabilitation process, she discovered the benefits of massage therapy firsthand.

"I have a second chance at life and I want to make the most of it," D'Amico said, adding that she was writing a memoir about her tragedy and hopes that it would have an impact on someone who can relate to it and it will help them prevail.

"D'Amico's act presents a sentiment between people and people. She came to Viet Nam with a dedicated heart for the kids and has spent time and money doing such meaningful activities for them," said Tran Dinh Song, a friend and volunteer who helped with her trip.

"She said she would not separate Yen from her cultural environment. She would enable Yen to communicate with Vietnamese in the US or bring her back to Viet Nam regularly. She wants Yen to have close ties with where she was born. I highly appreciate her good will."

D'Amico later returned to the center to hold a birthday party for Yen, though she told all of the kids that this first ever, big birthday party was for all of them. During this five-day, personally-funded visit, she also brought with her two packages of clothing and toys, many were donated by her friends and family.

"Yen is a shy girl," said a caregiver. "She often cries or runs away whenever she sees strange people, particularly foreigners. However, she acts differently with Ashley."

Yen may not grasp the significance of the party that was held especially for her, but her memories of the happy moments will always remain for her and D'Amico to recall in the future.

In a new flower-printed skirt and Converse sneakers that match D'Amico's, the two dance hand in hand to the rhythm of Sweet Child O'Mine by Guns N' Roses.

A tearful parting

As D'Amico and the other volunteers who gave a helping hand to organise the party got together for good-bye photos, Yen's happy smile disappeared.

As D'Amico lifted Yen off the ground for a good-bye kiss, Yen burst out crying, and D'Amico couldn't hold back her tears.

"It's tough to swallow. Seeing her cry makes me even more upset," D'Amico said.

"Before I arrived there, I had all of these positive emotions running through me. Right now I have all negative emotions.

"I feel bad for leaving her. I gave her such a nice day, different from her daily life, but now I have to leave again. Why can't I be allowed to give her a better life?"

To the girl who never takes "no" for an answer, adopting the Vietnamese girl is her determination in life.

"It may take me one or even five years, I will never give up."

With her words and deeds, D'Amico is taking this moment to make a difference in the life of little Yen. — VNS


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